Thursday, March 10, 2011

You're going to love my balls.

I've had a few posts kicking around in my head but just haven't had the gumption to write them. The one about "you're going to love my balls" is loosely about how I've been eating raw food balls for breakfast, but mostly it's an excuse to make jokes about balls. I get up in the morning and eat 3-4 balls! How many balls do you eat every morning? Balls balls balls deeeelicious balls.

And after all that you aren't even going to get a recipe. I basically just mush like a few tablespoons of coconut oil and some soaked dates and nut butter (haaaaaaa) and/or maybe a banana together in a bowl, then squish in 1.5-2 cups of oats that I've pulverized in a coffee grinder, along with some nuts (NUTS!) and dried cranberries and maybe flax meal. Then comes the very important ball formation process, and then I chill the balls in the fridge. Delicious and surprisingly filling, with the added bonus of being very easy to eat on the run.

I've been inventing stuff in the kitchen left and right. It's good creative work. The other day we had some curried rice fritters with all kinds of stealth ingredients--steamed cauliflower, pureed butternut squash, mashed tofu, chickpea flour--along with ginger, garlic, onion, and curry paste. The entire point of the exercise was to use up a packed takeout container of basmati rice from our favorite Indian restaurant, but I think I just found a new fried thing to love.

I've also been taking a vat of cut up fruit and veg to work every day, which has the dual function of keeping me occupied at my desk--I swear this office just makes me instantly want to nap and eat--and upping my raw food intake.

The other posts kicking around in my head are less uplifting. People who blog about reproductive justice full time have provided lots of resources and information about the right wing attacks on women--and make no mistake, they are attacks on women--at blogs like RH Reality Check, so it's not necessary for me to duplicate their work here. There are lots of links in my Reader feed over there on the right every day about this stuff because the anti-woman legislation being proposed (and passed!) on the national and state level is truly mind-boggling, sci-fi, dystopian horseshit. They're going after contraceptive access and health care access (apart from abortion, which they've always gone after). They're trying to criminalize miscarriage. They're saying that a fertilized egg has the same rights as a born human being and they're trying to write it into law. They're trying to force physicians who perform abortions to inform women that abortion increases the risk of breast cancer despite the fact that there are no scientific findings establishing a cause and effect relationship. My blood pressure is up just thinking about it.

The only good news is that it's Pro-Choice Resources Bowl-a-Thon time again, the one time of the year I send out email pitches to raise funds for a local organization that works to remove the barriers that prevent people from accessing reproductive health care and comprehensive sexuality information. They do extensive community outreach and education, they run a website for teens, they have a discussion/support group for women who have had an abortion, and they administer an abortion assistance fund that is their answer to the odious Hyde Amendment.

For every 8 women who apply for funds--grants for minors, no-interest loans for women over 18--PCR has to turn 7 away.

So I raise money for PCR. Then once I've raised all the money, I join my team, Spare Us From the MCCL (MN Citizens Concerned for Life), and I bowl badly, in celebration. Please consider sponsoring me if reproductive justice is a cause dear to your heart (and brain, and conscience).

See, the whole post sort of IS about balls. That's how I roll.


  1. Well of course all I can think of now is Alec Baldwin...and his schwetty balls.

  2. I was going to post that video even though it's seasonally inappropriate, and then I remembered I posted it recently. Siiigh, I am boring.

  3. No, it's just that Alec Baldwin is always, always funny.

    Also, so is Jon Hamm, when donning a Jamaican accent and trying to figure out what the nurses should have for lunch today...I just saw that recently. AND DIED.

  4. I like the sound of your balls.


  5. "They're trying to criminalize miscarriage."

    You have to be kidding. I mean, it's not funny but it is so ridiculous I don't even know where to begin.

    Balls is right.

  6. Sponsored, from someone who owns a pair of balls. *wicked grin*

  7. Thanks for your comment!

    Your cooking sounds delicious... I do that too, invent recipes based on what needs to be used up... right now I'm making butternut-bell pepper-garlic-chicken soup!